How to Love People Who Hate You (Or Going from Different to Dangerous)

It used to be that you just disagreed.

You were the “Jesus” person. He was your “thing.” No biggie. Their parents talked about Jesus, or they grew up going to church or they knew others who were “religious.” You were still cool.

They just saw life differently than you. They didn’t need that “crutch.” They weren’t into the Bible. They had other things to do on the weekend. They were spiritual but didn’t believe in organizing it into a church box.

Besides, you did nice things for people in the community. You represented Jesus and He’s all about love. You could be trusted. You worked hard. You forgave. You listened. You seemed to really care.

You were different but that’s okay. Everyone has different ideas. You could still be friends, family, coworkers, partners, community.

Then one day, that changed.

Not you.

But something.

Because now, you’re not different, you’re dangerous.

Now, it’s not okay to disagree.

Now, you’re what’s wrong with our country—maybe the world.

Now, they’re sure they understand Jesus better than you do.

Your understanding of Jesus makes people feel bad to the point they want to give up. Your understanding is archaic. It causes wars—probably even racism, sexism, abuse, and everything else the world hates.

Now, you’d better stop talking. They don’t want that kind of talk in their home, business, community, world. They won’t tolerate it. Not even for a moment.

Really, they wish you would just get on board or go away.

So, you do what you do. You open God’s Word and hit your knees asking for direction.

That hasn’t changed.

Love your neighbor as yourself.

Love your enemies. Pray for those who persecute you.

“But I say to you who hear, Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you” (Luke 6:27-28 ESV).

Now it’s getting real. Now, you experience an unfamiliar dimension of the gospel.

Suddenly the splintery wood and the piercing nails of the cross don’t feel like a concept you want to dip in gold and hang around your neck. You can hear the hammer on the nail head. You feel the thorns on His brow. You hear the taunts of His neighbors, coworkers, friends—people He’s healed and set free—shouting “Crucify.”

And Scripture comes alive on your front porch, your cubicle, your boardroom, the school committee meeting, or on the evening news:

If the world hates you, know that it has hated me before it hated you. 

If you were of the world, the world would love you as its own; but because you are not of the world, but I chose you out of the world, therefore the world hates you. 

Remember the word that I said to you: ‘A servant is not greater than his master.’ If they persecuted me, they will also persecute you. If they kept my word, they will also keep yours.

 

But all these things they will do to you on account of my name, because they do not know him who sent me. 

If I had not come and spoken to them, they would not have been guilty of sin, but now they have no excuse for their sin. 

Whoever hates me hates my Father also.  If I had not done among them the works that no one else did, they would not be guilty of sin, but now they have seen and hated both me and my Father. 

But the word that is written in their Law must be fulfilled: ‘They hated me without a cause.’”

John 15:18-25

You inhale His truth and exhale all that used to be true about the world around you.

You wish you had learned to love better when it was easier to love.

Loving people who tolerated you wasn’t all that difficult. Loving people who wish you were gone, who whisper lies, who consider you “the problem,” is a whole other can of worms. You can’t do that.

And Jesus draws you close and in the pages of His Word You hear Jesus say, “Of course, you can’t.”

“You need me. You always have but now you see it even more. I love those who hate you. Just as I loved you when you hated me. I loved you when your sin nailed me to the cross. I love you now and will love you into eternity. You can’t offer them what you don’t have but what you do have is Me. Offer My love, even when they reject you, mock you, laugh at you, silence you, or shut you out.”

So, You dig into His Word and remember everything you know about God.

You remember truth. You put on love. You remove all the emotional and social armor you first threw on when the threat appeared and replace it  with His armor—knowing it can be pierced on this side of glory but cannot harm you into eternity.

On the day you went from different to dangerous, nothing really changed except the scales fell from your eyes.

You’ve always been dangerous. You are light in a world that loves darkness. Light will prevail.

 

Now, let’s get out there and love our neighbors. It will never be easier than it is today.

BONUS post: 10 Hymns about Freedom We Can Sing Today


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7 Comments

    The Conversation

  1. Elaine Cooper says:

    Wow. This is so clear to me in this day of people pointing fingers and saying. “It’s YOUR fault.” Or “I suppose you have a Bible verse for that.” Thank you, Lori. And yes, I still love them. But it still hurts. I just go on and keep plowing the fields the Lord has led me too.

  2. Robin Farnsworth says:

    Thank you Lori! Spoken with compassion, with experience and most importantly with truth. – His truth that never changes. These are words that every Christian has to reckon with. The line is being drawn.

  3. Cathy Richmond says:

    I can understand non-believers having a different world view, but this year I’ve been feeling the hate from other Christians. Attempts to explain my position result in name-calling and blocking. It’s spiritual warfare within the body of believers.

  4. Julie Kaspick says:

    Thank you, Lori. A much needed Word for today!

  5. Mark & Karen says:

    Only Jesus brings beauty from ashes. Thank you for the beauty you’ve written here.

  6. Anonymous says:

    Amen!

  7. Rob McCullough says:

    Amen Lori, now is the best time to love. To learn to love, to practice loving, to become love as our God is love!