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Third Chapter Spiritual Disciplines

Posted Tuesday, February 28th, 2023 20 Comments
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We are going to die.

That’s what I said on Sunday to my best friend. Yeah, I can be cheery that way.

Surrounded that day by my children, their children, and the youngest generation at our church, I had cause to consider my years.

Aging isn’t for sissy-Marys.

Neither, however, is aging a curse, but a blessing.

Growing older comes with challenges, but it’s truly a joy, a gift, a boon

  • to live into a third chapter
  • to watch the next generation grow, and even glimpse the next
  • to know God into a fifth, sixth, even eighth decade
  • to proclaim Him with zeal and greater confidence having witnessed years of His faithfulness.

But, day-to-day, it’s no picnic.

The first time I injured my back simply by bending down to retrieve a paper clip, I realized I’d have to become a more creative storyteller—bending down to retrieve state secrets or to save a puppy from drowning in a stream, for instance, make a better face-saving tale.

Bodies have different needs over sixty and so do souls.

Our generation of believers was influenced by teaching on spiritual disciplines by writers like Richard Foster and Dallas Willard.

We are saved by grace alone. The good news of Jesus is what God has done for us, not what we do to impress God.

The spiritual disciplines help us stay open and available to God, growing up in our faith, and bent more toward Him than away.

Commonly understood as disciplines of the faith are Bible study, prayer, fasting, meditating on God’s Word, simplicity, solitude, submission, service, confession, worship, guidance, and celebration.

Aspects of these disciplines become easier as we mature.

Many of us fall more naturally into simplicity. We have more time for prayer. More occasion for solitude.

By now, Bible study and meditating on God’s Word should be daily second nature. Perhaps we’ve switched to the large print or rely more on audio versions.

Many of us continue to serve but we do so with modified energy or a closer focus to local ministry (although others appear to sprout wings in their third chapter, traveling to the ends of the earth).

Fasting requires new considerations.

Confessions are increasingly more related to internal sins of thought and attitude than wild behaviors—sins of omission outweigh those of commission.

There are alterations and modification that occur with these standard disciplines for mature believers,

but I’ve been thinking there are several disciplines we would be wise to add in these later years.

For instance, as we age, we generally have more opportunity for silence and solitude. It can be tempting to sink into that and begin to absent ourselves from community.

I believe a worthy discipline for our later years is Intentional Community. The discipline of showing up.

As embarrassing as this is to admit, coming from the “change” generation, it can also be tempting for us now to rest on our laurels and resist change.

Another worthy spiritual discipline for remaining open and flexible is the discipline to Embrace New Ways, People, and Experiences.

The older crowd can fade from others’ view. Some of us handle that by embracing our invisibility. We intentionally sideline ourselves or become geriatric wallflowers at church.

The younger generation needs us whether they know it or not. And we need them.

Persistent Engagement is a powerful spiritual discipline as we continue to seek new learning, enter conversations, and ask kind, gentle questions to build relationships with younger people.

Too many of us fall prey to fear, anxiety, panic, and rumormongering as we enter our later years.

The discipline of Whatever is True can remind us to take every thought captive and nurture courage, calm, and prayer-centered thinking so we don’t fret ourselves and our loved ones into a frenzy.

Additionally, we are now free of worrying what others think or falling prey to social convention. We are ideal candidates, then, for mentoring, discipleship, and evangelism.

The spiritual discipline of Bold Wisdom could hearten us to speak up, speak out, and proclaim truth with confident humility as we share the gospel with peers and guide upcoming generations at home and in the church.

Finally, to combat hardness, bitterness, unforgiveness, or general curmudgeonly spirits and to fight our inner pharisees, we must actively seek generous spirits and gentle hearts.

Ambassadors of Mercy is the discipline that would help us maintain these godly attitudes and prevent hardness of heart.

Over the next few posts, I want to explore each of these and offer them as Third Chapter Spiritual Disciplines.

Our generation has redefined so much of our culture, we’re perfectly capable of redefining what it means to be the “older generation” in our churches. We can make that an aspirational term, not a frustrated sigh.

I would love to hear your thoughts on this! I read and respond to every comment.

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    The Conversation

  1. Sheryl says:
    February 28, 2023 at 12:26 pm

    This is excellently written and I too have been thinking similarly. You have very thoughtfully included many angles that I had not really put into full words and thoughts myself. It is humbling to consider these seemingly end chapters in my life – I am encouraged to keep pressing into a life that Jesus wants for us all who age – be present, be active, continue to run the race.

    Reply
  2. Cheryl Lima says:
    February 28, 2023 at 2:29 pm

    I’m needing this right now! I have had too much change in a short time and I’m reeling from trying to adjust! My life with the Lord is good but I am having trouble knowing where I fit in with other believers.

    Reply
    • Lori Roeleveld says:
      February 28, 2023 at 2:32 pm

      It’s a challenge, isn’t it? We are finite and we have limits, so it’s good to acknowledge the difficulty and cut yourself some slack. But, remember that God continues to mold you and make you in Jesus’ image even into our later years. He is trustworthy and kind.

      Reply
  3. Tina says:
    March 1, 2023 at 12:39 pm

    I always look forward to your rich, spiritual insights on VERY practical topics…like aging. I am about 10 years older than you, so I am eagerly anticipating more Biblical wisdom for the “older women”….especially in our day and age! ??! Keep up the good work!

    Reply
  4. Ruth Holleran says:
    March 1, 2023 at 4:26 pm

    Yes. So wise.

    Two things:

    One, I don’t know why this happens but I notice a hardening of heart as we age (I am 63). I have to fight to stay tender, flexible, “green and full of sap”. I do not want to be a curmudgeon. But I do actually want to be a more bold and forthright speaker, as I have seen many older people become–just not so abrasive! I want to keep my communications seasoned with grace. It takes discipline.

    Two, I cannot forget how desperately I wanted a wise older woman in my life when I was in the thick of raising children, struggling to keep marriage fresh, and cooking gazillion meals. I told God if He couldn’t find the women to fill this role, then please use me in that capacity when I get older. I remember this when the young mothers in my church want me to speak at their mother’s Bible study once a month, even though I would rather stay home in that sweet invisibility of “retirement” and sew quilts.

    I feel inadequate to speak something meaningful to them. But last month I discovered I just need to show up and engage in conversation. The Holy Spirit brought to mind so many things I had learned from the Lord while child-raising. I went home just as encouraged as they were.

    It feels SO GOOD to be remembered by the Lord and to have this meaningful work.

    Reply
  5. Judy says:
    March 2, 2023 at 12:12 pm

    Right off the bat, I have to say my mother is 99, her name is Mary, and that’s one of her favorite sayings, “Getting old isn’t for sissies!”
    I have felt my world shrinking for awhile, and it’s my own fault. This was a reminder to get back in the game.
    Thanks, Lori.

    Reply
  6. Mark says:
    March 2, 2023 at 3:00 pm

    Lori, I love this post. Indeed, we “Seniors” don’t have any choice about whether or not we define what it means to be the “older generation” in our churches, because we ARE it, for good or bad, and I pray that we make it “good!” It would be nice to live in a culture that reveres the elderly like some other cultures in the world supposedly do, huh? But that’s probably a fading situation in the world if it’s even still around anymore at all after our Western Culture has exported our worship of youth around the world . . . something we who are now “old” very much had a hand in doing when we were the “young generation.” However, if we aged ones will only lift up Jesus and look like Him, His Beauty will draw everyone, young, old, and in between to Himself. THIS I truly believe . . . and I am dedicating what’s left of my life to try and realize this in my “Golden Years!”

    Reply
  7. Kristen says:
    March 4, 2023 at 7:59 am

    Lori, your writings are always so timely and rich. I am so grateful for this one and the ones to follow. You are just hitting the nail on the head again. I am in the phase of “I don’t recognize my life Lord. I really liked it before. Could I please have that one back?” I am dealing with the challenges of caregiving and working, trying to even get to church now, never mind being involved, feeling like I dont have much in common with anyone at the moment anyway. But desperately needing Jesus through this stage as the bitterness and attitude is always trying to take root and Im trying to face the future with trust and joy and not white knuckled! Thank you again for sharing your gift!

    Reply
  8. Deanne Draa says:
    March 9, 2023 at 6:30 am

    I’m 63, still help at youth group every Sunday night, counselor, fund raise for the next generation, camp director. My husband passed a year ago yesterday. The strong connection in this community of believers has carried me, it would have been so much harder to walk this most difficult year. The youth have given up a week to come paint my house, they stand outside and sing praise and worship music at my door. They have carried me. I am humbled and honored to have taught them for 25 years, and to see Jesus in them, brings me hope for such a time as this. I even have one college girl living with me because she doesn’t want me to be alone . I am blessed by them!

    Reply
  9. Hiding from People I Love (Post 2 in the Third Chapter Spiritual Disciplines Series) | Lori Stanley Roeleveld . . . Disturber of Hobbits, Writer, Speaker, Disturber of Hobbits applying biblical truth to life, culture, and today's headlines says:
    March 20, 2023 at 10:04 am

    […] Welcome to Lori Roeleveld « Third Chapter Spiritual Disciplines […]

    Reply
  10. Jan Clough says:
    March 23, 2023 at 2:24 am

    Dear Lori,
    Your honest and open words have hit the nail on the head as they echo my life in a nutshell. Having moved areas a year ago and enjoying a much slower pace of life in the countryside it would be all too easy to settle into a comfortable retirement just me and the Lord on my settee. However my faithful Heavenly Father has other ideas, l have heard His voice of encouragement gently nudging me to get back out there.
    I can look back with great fondness to the older people who blessed my life so much as l listened to their words of wisdom, sharing their failings, breakthroughs and their deep desire to selflessly encourage. They will perhaps never know the impact that they had upon my life.
    Thank you to all those who shared their honest thoughts, you have both encouraged and confirmed just what l need to do. I hear The Holy Spirit saying ‘Yes Jan what have I been telling you for sometime now’ There is life in the old dog yet as the saying goes. I am looking forward with great anticipation to returning to the fellowship where my Christian journey began in 1986. At almost 73 it’s time to get up off the settee after all l am still a new creation and The Lord has much for me to do Amen!
    Bless you Lori you never fail to hit the spot ?

    Reply