Don’t Worry! Be Irresponsible! Uptightism Vs. Dudeism (Part II in the Worry Series)

Don’t worry. Be irresponsible.

Honestly, on a deep subconscious level, this is what I often think my other choice is when it comes to dealing with worry.

So, part of the problem with abandoning worry as a lifestyle is my lack of role models. I have no practical idea what it looks like to live an adult life without anxiety.

I have seen people who don’t worry but they are either:

Irresponsible (Relax! Speed limits are just guidelines!),

The cause of worry in others (You get worked up over everything! I’ll go to the hospital if the chest pain is still there in the morning),

Self-medicating (Another round of margaritas while I wait for my friends to arrive, bartender!)

Or otherwise not engaged with reality (Life always works out for the best, man. People are waaaayy too hung up on regular meals and a warm bed. My kids are learning lessons from life, dude, from life!).

In my world, the people who worry are the ones who keep everything going. They are the go-to people who get things done. They are the workers, the movers, the cleaners, the bill-payers, the planners and the ones who keep everything from spinning out of control.

The relaxed people are the ones who make everyone else late.

The ones who are stress-free are generally carriers. It’s no coincidence that every person who has ever told me to “Relax!” has been the very person who was stressing me out in the first place! The calm “dudes” of the world are the ones who just don’t get it and who rely on those of us who do worry to bail them out when their laid back stance gets them in trouble.

So, is this the direction God wants me to head? Because, honestly, I think it would kill me to face these people in my life and say “You’re right, dude. I’ve been the problem all along. Me and my silly little worries. Let’s ignore the bills, tip back a few and sit out on my porch (because we’d better adjust NOW to living outside!).”

Well, that makes no sense but still, God very clearly states that I am not to worry – as a lifestyle.

Matthew 6:34: “Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.”

Philippians 4:6: “Do not be anxious about anything,”

Psalm 37:8: Refrain from anger and turn from wrath; do not fret—it leads only to evil.

So, probably, I’m looking at it wrong.

Maybe viewing it like it’s a choice between Uptightism and Dudeism is what’s out of whack. Maybe my choices aren’t limited to business suits or tie-dyed T’s, high-rises or homeless shelters. Maybe God is telling me that what He wants for me is so rare in the world that I have to learn directly from Him what it looks like.

OK, yeah, that sounds like God.

But, you’re out there saying, there are other types of people who don’t worry.

I agree.

There are the Donald Trump’s. These types seem pretty relaxed, don’t they? Well, sure. They’ve got pretty much everything they need. What’s to worry about?

Then there are the Mother Theresa’s. Sort of the anti-Trumps. They’ve chosen to have nothing, given up all possessions, personal plans and pursuits, ergo, they, too, have everything they need. No worries.

Striving to reach the state of Trump has probably contributed to my current attachment to fretting. I could go the way of Theresa but I’m very attached to my laptop, my books and my red chili coffee mug so that’s not happening.

What if I want to live the life Christ calls me to live within the context of the life He’s given me?

Oh, yeah, that’s His point.

Obviously, this is a big issue, this worry thing. Obviously, this is now, not just a part II but a series of posts. Because I am really not done figuring out how I’m supposed to give this up.

Well, actually, I have. I mean, I know I will give it up with the help of Jesus, by the power of His Holy Spirit, through prayer and study of His word. But as real as that is, that’s the “church answer” and I’m trying to figure out what it actually looks like because, honestly, I spend hours a week in prayer and in the Bible and I’ve walked with Jesus my whole life and I know about spiritual warfare and I am still plagued by worry so the answer may be simple but it sure isn’t easy, you know what I mean?

My guideline for this change process is to allow the Holy Spirit to renew my mind, to change my thinking as in Romans 12:2 “Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.”

So, I’m realizing I need a picture from God of what it looks like to live worry free without turning into someone who seems disconnected from reality. And I realize that part of the plan has to include meditating on the REALity and the TRUEth of the Kingdom of God. When my children were freaked out at the thought of monsters under their beds, I did not feel their stress because I understood the reality and truth of the situation.

I need to understand the reality and the truth of my situation. Ooohhh. Now I have to go and think about that and pray and read more scripture.

I don’t need to disconnect from reality – I need to connect with it. Wow.

I’ll be back.

Talk to me.